Doin the things

One year ago "ish" (March 3rd 2015), I decided it was time to focus my energy of being better to my body and mind.  Honestly, I was tired of feeling tired and having heartburn.  The amount of weight on my body was causing me to feel physically HORRIBLE.  I started this because I seriously just didn't feel good.  I have never been one to really reject how I look.  I have been blessed to have the confidence to feel good in my own skin.  I found a way to rock the "bigger girl look." Of course I always had the feeling that I wanted to be thinner, to not have the double chin, and to not wear wide calf boots.   I knew that eating healthy and working out were the tickets to a healthy body and mind.  We all know this.  What is hard is to carve time and dedication in this life to such a lifestyle.  One year ago it was time to do the things.

 I first started by doing weight watchers.  I downloaded the app and started "counting points."  I figured out the system and stuck to the program. I started to slowly feel better as I was fueling my body with the foods it needed to have energy.  About a month in I was sitting on the porch with my dear friend Amy.  She suggested we start doing the "couch to 5K app."  I told her ABSOLUTELY NOT.  (and other choice profanity words;) I told her "Girl you know I don't run."  I have always been an athlete but I hate to run.  She did what Amy does and somehow she convinced me to do this running business with her.  So WE did it.  We started running.  One of the worst things I can think of doing in this life.  I see runners on the street and I am mesmerized by how they do it as I have NEVER wanted to run.  But we did.  We ran... or so thats whats its called.  It was more like my heavy body slamming my feet into the pavement and being completely out of breath..feeling like I was dying.. EVERY TIME. Amy was right beside me cheering me on the entire time.Thankful for this human on so many levels. So... we did that running thing for a month or two.  Then, she decided to move to another town. Again, choice profanity words for leaving me. I was left to continue this thing that I hated... ON MY OWN.  Although I freakin hated it, it made me feel good.  Weird.  So I kept doing it by myself.  Then one day as I was running I started having shooting pain in my foot.  WHAT?!  I don't run so this was new to me.  I had a self/friend diagnosed stress fracture on my right foot.  I decided to table the running gig. Thank god for a stress fracture:)

Thankfully, my working out motivation was still high at this point.  I had endorphins.  I was losing weight. Working out made me feel so good. So I found the next thing to do to keep doing the things on this quest. This was during the summertime (2015) so I decided to ride my bike every night after I put the kids to bed. I would hop on the bike and ride.  This was completely liberating and meditative. Those nights I dedicated this time to myself and it felt so incredibly powerful.  I also signed up to mow our lawn because I could earn weight watchers points by doing that. The more points I earned the more I could eat & drink.  Bonus all around. On the weekends I would walk the lake and paddle boat with the kids. I felt so good moving my body so I had the mindset that any kind of movement was worth it.  I kept doin the things.

The next life event that caused change was we moved.  We were no longer near the bike trail and the season changed to fall so the nights came earlier. It was less convenient to do my nightly routine.  I took a few weeks off from working out but then I realized I was missing something in my life. I was still doing the weight watchers app and losing weight but that high you get from working out was not there.  Oh lord, I am starting to sound like a fitness addict;)  I needed a plan, so I went to the local library and checked out a couple work out videos.  The first one I did for a month was Jazzercise.  This was HILARIOUS.  It was a 1990's Jazzercise video.  If you have ever done Jazzercise, you will know what I'm talking about.  HILARIOUS!!  It wasn't too complicated and got me in the mind set of doing work out videos.  At that same time, I also checked out Jillian Michael's "no more trouble zones"  One night I decided to try this one out.  It was HARD.  Like the running gig.  I couldn't do all the moves and was yelling obscenities at Jillian as she so blissfully tried to motivate me.  One day I was doing this video with the girls in the room.  Harper says "mom why are those girls smiling and you are not?"  Out of breath, completely exhausted, and slightly yelling at Harper I say... "because mom can't do the moves yet!" :)  But afterward I felt so good and therefore I pep talked myself  to do this video nightly.  This brings me up to date.  I have been doing the Jillian 30 day shred for the past couple months along with my Weight Watchers App.  I have lost 64 lbs to date and more importantly my body and mind feel better.  That was the original goal and that goal is being met by choosing the foods that fuel my body and taking 20 minutes a night with Jillian to focus on strengthening my body, stretchimg, and giving my mind endorphins. 

Friends, I started this quest at 233 pounds.  Yes... 233 pounds.  I have lost the weight of my 7 year old child.  I picked her up today and about fell over.  I share all of this with you for a few reasons.  We belong to each other.  We learn from each other.  It's a process and journey not a destination.  This quest is life long and I continue to live one day at a time.  I allow for human error but continue to focus on living a peaceful balanced life.  The weight is just one piece of the puzzle and I'm so thankful that one year ago today I decided it was time.  I feel so blessed to have a tribe of humans who support me daily on this quest and in this life. With the right mindset I can do anything I set my mind to.  What a powerful feeling.

Keep on keepin on,
Kan